Nathalie -

Great day!

Last night we had a little partaj, or dinner thingy i should say. Great company always = in great nights. Food was great, people was great, i was in a great mood and it was just so...ahhh! :-D

I got an email today from Saba, a really dear friend that i had a little "break-up" with a time back, seriously it was really childish but i hope and think that we are both over it by now. I sure hope so. She is an amazing friend with alot of great values and she is always supportive....!

Honestly, i'm nervous, VERY nervous to see my girfriends. Ohh my, honestly VERY VERY nervous to see Emma. She is my female soulmate, trust me! Miss you sugar, it's not too long till i will be home now, just hang in there...please!

2007-05-28 @ 03:59:37 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (2) Trackbacks ()

MAJOR problem!

I'm going through all of my pictures that i have, on the computer and pictures that are not in the computer. How come that i have ONE, ONE picture with Helene, and TWO pictures with Alexandra, and these pictures are THREE years old, and i have TWO pictures with Emma, my best friend and ONE picture with Dalia. No way. Girls, b eready cause when i get home this is going to be a summer filled of picture taking, YEAH YEAH!

Love you girls!

Atleast we are hotter than THAT!:-D

2007-05-26 @ 22:09:25 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (2) Trackbacks ()

Weather, ohh you weather

Gosh,never can you get the weather you want it to be. it's starting to piss me off. I want some good weather, i NEED to look good when i go home. I know, i know, i still have a bunch of timeleft to get that tan, but people i really just want to get some color. You know, cause i just KNOW that my best friend will be tanned like she has done nothing else this year beside tanning....and what do i know, maybe she has. Owell. Take me as i'm i guess, ha? Yeah, that will work.

But the pool party we were having tonight, that we are having, just not a pool party, would have been tons better with some sunshine. Owell i guess, owell.

So going through all of my closet to see if i lost some clothes and wehat i want to through away before i leave i reliezed that i have lost THREE of my favorite shirts, and i don't know where and when. It sucks though, cuase i want them back, and i have been looking for them for the past month, and now reality came and i really did see that they are gone. :-(
I know that it's just a shirt, but that shirt might have ment something to me, okay?

2007-05-26 @ 20:20:00 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

You did WHAT?

Today has been a very emotional day, very very emotional day. But a VERY good day. Me and C have a serious talk, a good talk. About our past, things we have done, feelings we have felt, people talking advantege of you and so on. I said things that i have needed to say, things that will make it easier for him to understand ME, Nathalie. Now he will know why some things scares me, when he says some things or when he acts in a certain way. It's not a low point in our relationship, it's a high point, cause now we know, now we know the answers to things that we in the quiet have always wondered. Now we know.

I know though that their is some things to do deal with when i get home, some things i need to tell and talk to people about.

Today someone aske me how it feels to be leaving so "soon", and i didn't even think for a secund, i just said "i need the city, i NEED it". Ohh god do i miss walking the streets on Drottning gatan, the streets that takes me from Mom to Dad, From Dad to Alexandra, Dad to Solna Hallen, The buss to school...ohhh!

C, I love you!
Sweden i miss you!

2007-05-26 @ 04:55:28 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

Just thought...

I would show you, this is a picture taken th eother day, very new that is :-D

2007-05-25 @ 18:35:13 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

Cause we are all strong people

'Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing.' "

Thinking about it, it's true. What does not kill us just makes us stronger. Trust me i know from my own experience. But also this quote is also something that my Grandma U-B and My Grandma B has always said to me when i've been hurt by something. Two very strong and speciall women in their own way. overcoming everything they have, being where they are at after everything they have gone through is amazing, and i look up to both of these women caus ethe prove that you can always get up and stand tall and be proud of yourself. Grandma, borth of you, i love you!

Did all my laundry yesterday and celebrated my anniversary with my boyfriend, we cooked. Let me tel you we will always have good food on the table gause that guy sure as hell know's how to cook a good stake. WOW! So we ate stakes, extra thin ones, with peas, watermelon and strawberries. Then we watche da movie witj Jeri and Donovan and I made milkshakes, strawberry and chocolate milkshakes, they were AMAZING!

Ohh, can't wait to cook at our new house all of july with C, it's going to be the best summer of my life!

2007-05-25 @ 18:22:45 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

The Holiday...YES! It's great .

Okay so right now you are going, huh? Hahaha. It's funny. Well, i watched the movie "The holiday" last night. By myself, with a glass of ice cold water with ice in it. Boring life? Well, just emotional right now. But how ever i absoultely LOVED that movie, it was one of the best movies in a long time. Cameron Diaz, which i usuallt don't like and the same goes for Jude Law both played their parts great and...i almoust fell inlove with the movie. Ha!

And not in the characters and not in Jude Law, cause i'm already IN LOVE, with my one and only C. Daaa!

The way he looks at her. The way she looked at him. Their chemestry, but yet the way they could talk. Their hidden feelings that yet was so obvious to the other person. How they fell in love with each other after just lookig at one another for 10 sec, WOW. It does happen. Trust me, it happend to me. And i'm still in love with him.

And ohh yeah, Helene you freakin suck, your blog?! Hallo?! And yeah, Alexandra, you made my day at the low point today. GREAT talking to you and i miss you!

2007-05-25 @ 05:43:20 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

I didn't FREAKIN know!

Breakfast at starbucks in like 40 min. GREAT. doesn't really go with my diet, but what the hell sometimes. I'm sitting on MSN talking to some people from my old class, and he said that their party last night was wild then heck and tey all had a blast. I din't think about that today was gonna suck more then last night did. I want to know everything about it, but yet, i don't. But know i do so i guess that;s what it's gonna have to be.

I shouldn't but i will. Look what my love send me so i had it on my phone when i woke up this morning.
" Hey my love,i was thinking about how i could say this kinda romantic since it's in front of YOUR house. - our life together will always be perfect walking down our road even though there is construction and you take one detour and i take a diffrent one(meaning you in sweden and me here), but when the short detour is over, everytime it directs us back on the main road abnd our road we are going to to live and look forwward too! Remember that this detour is only a small travel compared to the length of the road. It may take a year or two but i'm ready and willing to do whatever it takes to keep you walking and ending your detour where mine also ends, and we go back to living together and then keep walking on to marriage and whatever our life has at hand, but together hand in hand. All for for my love who is the most amazing young women in the world!"

Awwww!

Alskar dig !!!

2007-05-23 @ 16:37:12 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (2) Trackbacks ()

Just in Swedish, sorry people could not find it in English.

UTSEENDE

[ ] Jag är kortare än 160cm.
[ ] Jag skulle vilja att mitt hår var i en annan färg.
[ ] Jag har vänner som aldrig har sett min naturliga hårfärg.
[ ] Jag har en tatuering.
[ ] Jag vill tatuera mig
[ ] Jag har haft/har tandställning.
[ ] Jag har glasögon/linser.
[ ] Jag skulle gå på plastikoperation om det var ofarligt och gratis.
[x] En helt okänd person har sagt att jag är snygg.
[ ] Jag har fler än två piercingar.

FAMILJ

[ ] Jag har svurit åt mina föräldrar.
[ ] Jag har rymt hemifrån.
[ ] Jag har blivit utslängd hemifrån.
[ ] Jag har ett syskon som är under ett år gammal.
[x] Jag vill ha barn nån dag.
[ ] Jag har barn.

FÖRHÅLLANDEN

[ ] Jag är singel
[x] Jag är i ett förhållande.
[ ] Jag är förlovad.
[ ] Jag är gift.
[ ] Jag har varit på en blind date.
[x] Jag saknar någon just nu.
[ ] Jag har varit otrogen i ett förhållande.
[ ] Jag har skiljt mig.
[ ] Jag har sagt att jag älskade någon och ljugit.
[x] Jag har sparat något från ett gammalt förhållande.

SKAMLIGHETER

[x ] Jag har sagt "lol" i en riktig diskussion.
[x ] Jag börjar ännu också gråta av Disney filmer.
[x] Jag har gråtit av skratt.
[ ] Jag har limmat fast min hand i något.
[x] Jag har skrattat tills någon form av dricka har kommit ut ur näsan/munnen.
[ ] Mina byxor har gått sönder på en offentlig plats.
[ ] Jag har gjort bort mig på scen för mer än 100 pers.

SKOLA/JOBB

[x] Jag studerar
[x] Jag jobbar.
[x] Jag har somnat i skolan/jobbet.
[x ] Jag har missat mer än en vecka av skolan.
[ ] Jag har stulit någonting från min skola/arbetsplats.
[ ] Jag har fått sparken.

ERFARENHETER

[ ] Jag har tappat bort mig i min hemstad.
[x] Jag har sett en fallande stjärna.
[x] Jag har önskat då jag sett en fallande stjärna.
[x] Jag har varit på en offentlig plats i min pyjamas. (i trappuppgången)
[x ] Jag har tryckt på alla knappar i en hiss.
[x ] Jag har sparkat nån mellan benen.
[ ] Jag har varit i ett casino.
[ ] Jag har hoppat fallskärm från ett flygplan.
[x ] Jag har gått "skinny dipping".
[x] Jag har svimmat
[x] Jag har lekt sanning eller konsekvens

ÄRLIGHET

[ ] Jag har gjort något som jag lovat någon annan att inte göra.
[x] Jag har gjort något som jag lovat mig själv att inte göra.
[x] Jag har smygit ut utan lov.
[ ] Jag har ljugit om var jag är för mina föräldrar.
[x] Jag har en hemlighet som ingen vet.
[x] Jag har fuskat i ett spel.
[x] Jag har struntat i ett prov.

DÅLIGA TIDER

[x] Jag har druckit alkohol.
[ ] Jag dricker mig berusad mer än en gång i månaden.
[ ] Jag har blivit diagnoserad med depression.
[ ] Jag tar mediciner mot depression.
[x ] Jag har sovit en hel dag utan att ha behövt det.
[x] Jag har vaknat gråtande.
[x] Jag har somnat gråtande

MATERIALISM

[x] Jag äger mer än 10 par skor.
[x] Jag äger en iPod eller en mp3-spelare.
[x] Jag äger något från H&M.
[ ] Jag samlar på serietidningar.
[x ] Jag äger något jag köpt på E-bay.
[ ] Jag äger något från Diesel.

RANDOM

[ ] Jag har stulit en bricka från en snabbmatsrestaurang.
[ ] Jag har lätt för att öppna mig för nya människor.
[x] Jag ser på nyheterna.
[ ] Jag dödar inte insekter.
[ ] Jag svär ofta.
[x] Jag sjunger i duschen.
[ ] Jag är en morgonperson.
[ ] Jag betalade för min rington.
[ ] Jag är petig med grammatik.
[x ] Jag är en sportfanatiker.
[x ] Jag är bra på att baka.
[ ] Min favoritfärg är vit, ljusröd eller ljusblå.
[ ] Jag skulle ha pyjamas på mig till jobbet.
[ ] Jag vet hur man skjuter.
[x] Jag skrattar åt mina egna skämt.
[ ] Jag är bra på matematik.
[x ] Jag tror på spöken.
[x ] Jag kan inte sova om det finns en spindel i rummet.
[ ] Jag är väldigt kittlig.
[ ] Jag älskar mörk choklad.
[ ] Jag spelar datorspel och/eller Playstation-spel.
[x] Jag är bra på att minnas ansikten.
[x] Jag är bra på att minnas namn. (oftast)
[ ] Jag har ingen aning vad jag vill göra med resten av mitt liv.

2007-05-22 @ 19:29:58 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

YES!

So Mr lt. Andy Baldwin finally picked his girl, MIss Tessa was the one for him, something that i have said for a VERY VERY long time, he has been so patient and understanding with her that it was very obvious that he had strongest feelings for Tessa but maybe a more electric connection Bo bevin. To me he defenatley choosed the RIGHT girl. And they will tonight tell us what is going on and what is on their agenda. SWEET!

And just look how HAPPY they are knowing that they have the future together!

2007-05-22 @ 18:03:58 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

Cause it's HIS birthday!

Today it's C's birthday. Today is my old classes graduation party. Today, for some reason, is a weird day. I'm scared, i'm not going to lie about it. It's weird because it is SO many things that are going on, SO many things that i want to do, and SO many things and feelings and thoughts that are just a confusin right now. I really do sound like a nut case, haha, don't i?

But you know what, it is hard sitting on the other side of the world, knowing that what i should go through with them they are now going through WITHOUT ME! Owell, i KNOW that they will have an amazing night, full of happiness, love and friendship and i wish them all that, they are all worth it after these three fast years. Did we not just meet? Obvioulsy not. Ha, i swear it feels like we just all sat down in the same classroom, looking around and feeling totally lost, looking at people we had never seen before, peple that are now some of our closest friends.

But it's just not their day it's C's birthday, the first birthday that we celebrate together, as a couple. I was watching the last episode of the bachelor yesterday(great choice by the way, will talk about tgat later!) but while watching it got even clearer and more strongly understandeble that i WILL spend the rest of my life with him, because i KNOW for a fact that there is no better guy then him out there, no one else that can ever bring out the best sides of me at all times. No one else then him. Yes, he is younger then me, but people get over it, worse things have happend, most have happend, if not you live a really sad life let me tell you. So what did i get him for his bday? A pair of gergous(can not spell i know!) aviators and my vavorite cologne, Jeans Paul Gulitier. I absolutely LOVE It, even though i love him more. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROMEO!!!

2007-05-22 @ 17:56:21 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (1) Trackbacks ()

Sunshine

The sun is shining and it's about 85 F outside (27C). It's great. It's time to get good looking. YEAH YEAH! Yesterday was fun, BBQ at Joakims house. I will tell you more about it. Today i'm probably just gionna be lazy, try to get sum things to work on the computer or something. Ohh no, i wonder how that's gonan go? LOL.

Me and Lilly! <3

2007-05-21 @ 18:59:34 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

Sunday bloody sunday...or something, i don't know

My parents are back in la suede now. Feels good to know that they made it home safely and that they had a GREAT time in Chicago. My brother said that it was cool cause they saw cops, firetrucks and ambulances ALL the time. The things that satisfy a 10 year old, it's amazing! He's amazing, my little baby.

I know i have been REALLY lazy and not been writing anything on here for a long time, AGAIN. I'm sorry. There is just alot of things going on, maybe not to do, but alot of thoughts and feelings in my head. I leave soon, but yet it's still not soon soon. I've been doing all diffrent kind of things. Shopping, running, playing basketball, working on C's grandparents farm(hey, if it makes money i'm up for it!), had dinner at Joakim's house, gone to a car race, been to WALMART probably 500 times, put all the music i can on my ipod...it's been, things to do i guess.

You know, it's weird in a way i'm ready to go home like NOW, but it feels weird to even think about that i'm going home, it's crazy, this has been my home for a year. And people here and families here has made me feel home, but you it's still not home home. Except for C's house + family, that is as much home as home in Sweden, isn't that like REALLY weird? Yeah i think it is. But i LOVE IT.
Also, recently, lately, people has been telling me that it's for the best that you break up with the person that you are dating when you go to college or if you are gonna be on two totally diffrent places, far from each other. Why not fight for what you've got, we not hol don to the person you love the most, why not stay woth someone that loves you for YOU, someone that loves everything about you even 10 pounds heavier or 10 pounds lighter, with or without make-up? It's priceless. The things you do for love. Why even be with someone if you think that you are gonna go through life with that person or a relationship with that person if you aren't ready to fight for it? Well, i'm sure as hell ready to do whatever it takes. He is the guy i want to be with, he is the guy i want next to me thrugh good and bad, he is the one guy that has ever made me feel like i'm actually worth something, like i matter, like he is nothing without me. And that feeling is the best feeling i have ever felt, i feel it every time i look into his eyes.

Since this seem to be a really deep blogging time, i need to tell you people that read this that it hurts right now knowing that i won't graduate with me girls, and even more that i wont even be there when they graduate. It sucks, i didn't think that it was gonna be that hard, but it is. It's my girls, i want to be there with them, i want to feel what they feel graduating together, but on the other hand there is things in my life from this year that i never would want undone, such as coming here. But still, you know, it's my girls. But also, most of them don't even seem to care anymore, some of them hasen't cared all year and that proves more things to me then ever before, it shows me exactly what kinda friend that had me as. Alexandra, Helene, Jackie, Emelie you are all girls that has suprised my, and i'm praoud to say that you have all stood by my side this year, through thick and through thin. You are amazing. In a few weeks i will be home again and then you will know where to find me. Love you all.

It's time for a movie.

Wish i was that little sometimes!
(Me in 1990)

2007-05-21 @ 03:44:45 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (1) Trackbacks ()

Pretty much just going to say

That my dear friend Helene is amazing and that my heart got all warm and bubbly when she said that she was proud of me! Love you me dear! (L)
(www.drott.blogg.se/)

And yeah, I love, love, love mr.C!

2007-05-17 @ 05:48:39 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

Photos!

People, there you go, some pictures, it takes forever too upload, so this is what you get right now atleast!
And ohh yeah, here is the coat i want by the way, http://store.delias.com/item.do?categoryID=490&itemID=46337&sizeFilter=&colorFilter=&brandFilter=

PAPPA! *wink- wink*
(L)

2007-05-16 @ 18:16:55 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (1) Trackbacks ()

Feels like i'm busy

Okay, so it's been a while since i last wrote here, ans honestly there is no eplanation. I've just had things to do and not spend that much time by the computer. I'm sorry, this blog thing i know i kinda suck on. Owell, i will TRY to get better and thenlet me know what you think.

Graduation was this weekend and it was...fun and weird, i don't really know how to describe it, right now i just think it sucks that i wont get to graduate with my lovely girls at home, i have to go through it all by myself next year. But after almoust a year here both me and you know that there was a reason why i came here, even though i doubted many times. I met Chad, love of my life. But about graduation, i will show you pictures later today, from my Parents and brothers visit.

It's hard at the moment, knowing how i should balance the time i have left here, that's kinda what is freakin me out, and it shoulden't. Shoulden't i just hang out with who i want? And do what i want to do?
Well, i guess that's easier said then done.

Today it's hot again, but i'm still sitting here and looking on shop online stores and i found this AMAZING wintercoat that i really, really, really want, so please people that jhelp me with things like that...SUPRISE ME! LoL. :-D
Just a thought i guess. http://store.delias.com/item.do?categoryID=490&itemID=46337&sizeFilter=&colorFilter=&brandFilter=

Time to go and eat breakfast maybe. The pictures are on their way.

2007-05-16 @ 17:36:43 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

Just like that

Party tonight. But not that kinda of party that you would think about...i guess. I'm graduation from high school, even though i'm in like college in sweden. a year has almoust pasted and school has been out for a week almoust and tomorrow we graduate. But since i always like to be diffrent i have my praty tonight :-)
Just like that

It is like 85-90F outside, which would be like 25-30C. It's awesome, and very HOT. I just layed outside for like 20 min and i could see my strap marks, so i went down and tanned insetad in the tanning bed fo rlike 10 min. I don't know if it did anything, but it was VERY relaxing. That's for sure.

Right now i'm just sitting here and thinking, cause i can't find my camera and that is gonna be HORRIBLE for tonight, so i'm really upset and don't know what to do about it right now. I guess i'm gonna have to figure something smart out. We'll see what that end up to be.

Gotta go and continue looking for my camera. I will stop by later!

My dress for onight, together with black "heels" and a side ponytail. Show you apicture later!

2007-05-11 @ 21:58:37 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (2) Trackbacks ()

I just...

...read Helene's comment about that she wants me tp update my blog more. So i thught, okay i will! :-D But i also have to say that she is as bad as me on updating it! (http://drott.blogg.se/)

But owell. I will try to be the better perosn of ud then.

Today is my first day without school here in America, and you want to know hoe it feels, i know. I don't mis sit a single bit. I'm done with high school. Thank god. Other then that this time, knowing when i leave and how much time i have left is very frustrated, i know that people will make a big deal out of who i hang out with and when and so on. But isn't MY life and MY dicisions? Well, somtimes i wonder if that's really how it woks. And also knowing that it will be hard to jugle all the people when i get home as well just makes me want to go and hide, or lock myself into a room where only i can be in. That would be great. Having my parents here as well is kinda hard too, i love the fact that they are here but it releases soooo many feelings that i have had this year that yet haven't showed or that i haven't let go of. I now know how much i have missed my Mom and our talks, my step dads smart and supporting comments. It's something that is more then priceless.

Enough about all these feelings. I'm sitting here thinkking about what to wear for graduation, i have three diffrent dresses, a yellow one, a black on eor a red one, they are all very hot and sexy, even though my whole body feels like it is majorily bigger. But it's not. So idk.

Wide hips and big boobs are okay isn't it? I hope so cause i can't do anything about it. Being tall on top of it don't really feel like that is helping. How did that happen by the way, my Mom is PETIT! Owell.
Starting to have my hair curly, people seem to like that better. I haven't decided yet what me, myself and I think about it!

My two lovely girls!

2007-05-09 @ 17:37:04 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (1) Trackbacks ()

inspiring

I read my dear friend Helene Drott's blog, and i got really inspired. So i'm kinda gonna write about what she wrote about to day as well. I'm really spoiled and i have always been, and i like it. I know that i can do whatever i want to do, with some time and som patince everything is possible. I know that for a fact now. lt's amazing how you just feel like you know some things. I sound like a spoiledf brat, i know, but i'm not. And i'm just not saying that to say it actuallky is that way. I'm down to earth and i'm not a stuck up bitch, but i sure as hell can act like it, i know, but it dosen't even bother me actually. You have to get out there, you have to do things for you and after 500 tries and people don't get it or don't see what you are saying or what you are gonna do, youjust have to do it for yourself. Cause, are you suppose to hurt yoursefl all the time to make someone else happy?
No. You shoulden't. And that6's one of the things i have really learned this year.
Just be you and do what you want, don't live a life someone else wants for you!

2007-05-07 @ 20:02:52 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (0) Trackbacks ()

Shopping, yupp that's what we do!

Yesterday, Monday, was all about shopping. I had a great time and the poeple that were with me are the most amazing people ever( Chad, Mom, Bernt and Ludvig!). We had a blast. Yeah i kinda complained for abit over my totally sunder burned face, but ohh mu god it hurts so bad.

So we went to Nebraska huskers football stadium, i have been there before, but this time we got in on the infiled thanks to a great guy that i know. We saw there weight room, their locker room, their extra facilities and so on. And hey, alot of the acyuall football team was THERE so we got to see them as well. My brother was thrilled and his face was priceless. After that it was SPENDING MONEY TIME. Fun, fun, fun. We went to the biggest sports store there is in Lincoln and then it was time for the REAL shopping. My Mom and them didn't buy that much to start with but as time went by more and more money was spent. It was GREAT!
I got most of all the things that i want when i go home, i found this REALLY cute Addidas jacket that i want sooo badly. I think i might ask Dad if i can get that as my graduation gift here.

isn't ADOREBLE! wELL, I REALLY WANT IT. :-D

today has just been a really long day, it sucks being in school knowing that my parents are here and i could see them but i have to be in school. It sucks. Atleast they are picking me uyp after school and then we are just gonna hang out all night. School concert too, my bad, can't forget that. I took Thursday and Friday off from school, we are going to Kansas City on Friday but Thursday is just a extra day with the family. Tomorrow night is Parents in law dinner, haha, LoL, good thing that they have a BLAST together after the short amount of time they spent the other day. GREAT start. Welcome to my klife folks.

Hope everyone had a amazing weekend, and friends, I miss you.

2007-05-01 @ 21:31:10 Permalink Allmänt Kommentarer (1) Trackbacks ()